I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
