No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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