Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
