to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
They should really pass out barf bags in church
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
