just tell him i said nine months
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
