HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
