Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
