If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
