Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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