we're blogging at a bar
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
