i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Randomize
