Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Randomize
