He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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