We're like a lot better than the average bears
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
