a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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