White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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