I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
