well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
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