What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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