Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
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