Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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