CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
