Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
