I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize
