Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
