why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
