Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
we're making bets on your personal life
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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