I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
