it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
