I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize