Sponge bath it is.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize