was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
