Christians are straight up FREAKS
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Randomize
