If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize