i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
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