Where did you get a picture of my penis
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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