If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
