Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
She even gives head with a lisp.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
