I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Randomize
