What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
where am i from again
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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