i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
