yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
