peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
