"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
