garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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