I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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