Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
