Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
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