You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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