my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
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