I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
